Hey. Most days, I’m happy playing with a paper towel tube or whatever socks I can find — often, a bug will suffice. But for some reason,Mamma keeps bringing home toys. Some make noises (a bean, a gorilla, a pig and a lobster), and some just squeak and look funny (feet, rubber chickens, a big yellow orangutan). But the other day, she brought home the most wonderful toys: Dirty Rotten Kitty, and Chef Doggie Dog.
they are MINE,all mine. Jean-Luc may not have them. I called them, I dibs’ed them, and he won’t listen. I take DRK to my bed for a little gnawing, and there he is, with CDD, trying to hide him under the table. No! No no! I race across to get Chef Doggie and as soon as I get him, Jean-Luc takes Dirty Kitty! Once I finally got Dirty Kitty and Chef Doggie, both, with me, Jean-Luc just sat there and watched. I thought he was falling asleep, and I finally could relax. I turned my head for a second and what does he do? Covers about 15 feet with one big jump, and pinned me to the floor. I got the loose skin in front of his ear firmly in my teeth and pulled, and he retaliated by taking a big bite of my whole face. Think of the circus guys putting their heads into the lion’s mouth, but with it being the Lion’s idea. Dammit! Mamma finally stepped into the fight, took Dirty Rotten Kitty and Chef Doggie Dog, and put them away. Know what she said?
I’m the Alpha, Beyotch. Never forget that.
